Thursday, January 29, 2009

Some Updating

You may remember Lauren & Soda from the Isaan wedding. Well they did meet as planned but alas Soda had sobered up and wised up as well! She brought along her friend and another male friend and they had a nice chat and that was that. I think Lauren was expecting more, a lot more! Poor Lauren, he had to spend another night in Korat. A very large part of me was pleased Soda had come to her senses.

Dragon Hills Golf Course in Ratchaburi gets even more plaudits. As I learned today, on Thursdays they offer a reduced green & caddy fee @ 650 baht. Allowing for minimum 200 baht tip to caddy this means a round will cost 850 baht. Is there better value to be had anywhere else? I would like to know! Also noteworthy that drinks on the course were reduced: a bottle of water cost 10 as opposed to the normal 15 baht, a can of Pepsi was charged at 15 baht and a bottle of Gatorade 30 baht. We ate there after and the food was excellent…..green curry and fried chicken and noodles. Worth the detour and even though my golf remains shit they are going to be seeing my golf bahts. They appear to like golf and golfers and are working hard to attract custom and I will certainly support them: it is a gem of a course designed by an American, Jim Engh, and worth googling the aforementioned Mr Engh.

Courtesy of Wikipedia I got some more information on the Chinese New Year. The celebrations actually last for 2 weeks. It is interesting because a number of business are still closed in Ratchaburi. My favourite builders merchant/tool shop is not reopening until 1st February 2009. Only on Saturday did he stop me buying a Chinese drill bit, "rubbish" he said, "this is a better brand. From Australia." Also the lady that serves the best "kao mun gai", a chicken and rice breakfast meal, has not reopened. I hope they have a pleasant holiday because I can tell you they both work extremely hard and appear to have successful businesses.

And it is getting hot!!!!

Monday, January 26, 2009

Chinese New Year in Ratchaburi

Our Western New Year is usually brought in by a countdown and depending on your tastes a lot of alcohol and other drugs, and in my case a lot of mayhem and madness went with it, when I was still at it as we say in the trade! I must confess that I was sometimes soberish but thereagain there were times I was so drunk I missed it or got into so much trouble I was left to my own company. I do not believe I monopolised this behaviour! It's a pretty wretched affair really and in Scotland we regarded Christmas as a sort of dress rehearsal for New Year,you know, get your self into shape for a good session for Hogmanay & Ne'erday as we call it! Last New Year was very low key sitting on the beach in Langkawi and tucked up in bed with Luna by about 0130h.

Now I could not tell you the precise moment the Chinese New Year begins but we are celebrating it in Ratchaburi, throughout Thailand and the rest of the region. Here in Ratchaburi we are giving it big licks so to speak. It is really in stark contrast to the orgy of the western New Year. Sunday morning we were wakened by fire crackers that initially I thought were machine gun bullets! Really loud. A lot of shops and businesses were closed. A lot of cars sported orchids on their bonnets

We went out in the evening and the central market area had been transformed into Ratchaburi Chinatown, with red lanterns, red ceremonial gates, lots of bright lights and ceremonial dragons and snakes lining the river bank. Lots of people were wearing red shirts and there were plenty of women wearing red kimonos sporting dragons. In addition a large stage area had been built and later that hosted the mandatory beauty contest with 50 beauties fighting it out for the honours.

It was just such a relaxed, gentle atmosphere. People were milling around in family groups, snacking and taking it nice and easy. There were some interesting spectacles in addition to the beauty contest. When we arrived, the iron man competition was getting underway featuring the Thai version of the Venice Beach boys. The competition was to haul one of two old fire engine about 100 metres and to do it faster than your opponent. Finally Beefcake 1 and Beefcake 2 were set for the big match. Beefcake 1 clearly fancied himself but unfortunately couldn't get his fire engine rolling and Beefcake 2 had crossed the winning line with his before Beefcake 1 got his moving. It was hysterical because someone had overlooked the fact that these fire engines needed to be steered so as Beefcake 2 got his moving someone had to jump into the cabin and steer the thing if hundreds of kids were not to be crushed to death. Meanwhile Beefcake 1 was going mad and I presume he was suggesting foul play, that the hand break had not been released or the engine was not in gear or some such similar. He was kicking his fire engine and being very unThai. After this abortive first face off the organisers decided the best thing to do was to call the show off.

So we wandered and there were more "Hello Teacher Gerrys" and many "Hello Teacher Lunas", "Hello Teacher Mimis" and "Hello Teacher Fleurs". One of Luna's students told her I was very handsome! Clearly a case of very bad eyesight. We even saw one of the ladies from Ratchaburi Registery Office who made it difficult for us to register our wedding but we smiled and I pointed to Luna's wedding ring and then gave her the thumbs up. There were spectacular dragon fights and great fireworks. A human pyramid formed and a dragon's body with full ceremonial head was wrapped around the bodies and an acrobat on an adjacent lit fireworks in the dragon's mouth and set off an amazing shower of sparkling light. I even managed to attach a written new year wish to a tree with a large pole bearing a hook at the end.

The little ferry that takes you across the Meklong to the army camp was bedecked in bright red lanterns and this looked very distinctive as it drifted across the river. The pier had been temporarily turned into a spirit temple laden with red lanterns but also with lots of statues of Chinese spirits and the locals were going in, lighting lots of incense sticks and making wishes for the new year.

I watched the beauty contest for 30 minutes or so. I reckon the best thing about it were the katoey dancers in black trouser suits with red fans. One of them was a student of Mimi. The boy was so incredibly camp and effeminate when we met him before the show but this is how it is here. As I have commented before being male and wanting to be female is completely non-controversial.

As for the models well the make up trowels had been busy and ditto the hair lacquer aerosols and the lipstick. This is another feature of mainstream life here. Most events like this have a beauty contest. Thai style fun, sanook dee, usually involves a lot food and a beauty contest! When the festivities get under way in April for the Thai New Year, the beauty contest in Chiang Mai, to the north of Thailand will be televised live on national TV and there will be a separate male competition as well. The prize money is huge by local standards.

I remember well how popular Miss UK and Miss World were in the 1970s back in the UK. Major event for my sisters and mother! I guess the impact of feminism put paid to these cattle shows in the West. Luna is a big fan and she says the filipinos like a beauty contest as well. Our models tonight were dressed in tennis gear and I really can't say a lot more other than that I like they way they glide slowly down the cat walk and keep a smile by raising their eyebrows as high on the foreheads. It was standing room only at the contest and I got the distinct impression the women in the crowd were much more into it than the men. I don't know who won because we left before the end.

So what a pleasant way to bring in the Year of the Ox. Very civilised, very gentle, really relaxing and no groups of drunken revellers indiscriminately pissing all over the place, shouting obscenities at all and sundry and in all other respects being objectionable. If my understanding of written Thai is correct the market area will remain Chinatown Ratchaburi until 31st January so we will probably take another stroll down there before it ends.

Sunday, January 25, 2009

St John Bosco

What in God's name does St John Bosco have to do with a blog on Thailand?! I know, nuts, huh!? Well I was married in the church of St John Bosco, Ratchaburi, just over three months ago and it being Sunday today and me being a good Catholic, ok a much better one than I used to be, well I was there with Luna today for mass. John Bosco,according to the Catholic Encyclopedia at New Advent, died 31st January 1888. So we celebrated his anniversary today and I really must say it was a beautiful event.

Some 50 or so priests concelebrated the mass led by our dear friend The Bishop of Ratchaburi, Panya Kitcharoen. He also has the distinction of marrying us ( some poetic license I think) and we have already shared a joke with the good Bishop about the munificence of his blessing as we are of the view that Luna conceived on our wedding night. There were two western priests on the altar today, the rest were Thai or Asian. Whatever your views on the Catholic Church, and hey, I am very comfortable with you being very against it, ( as I used to be!) this is an astounding testimony to those early missionary priests who came to Ratchaburi about a century ago. The church was bursting at the seems today, with nuns from various orders and the local Catholic community of which I am a part.

Now my Thai is pretty basic so while I imagine I could follow the order of the mass in any language I did not have much understanding of the readings and prayers that were offered for today's occasion. I was expecting Bishop Panya to preach after the gospel but I and others were taken aback when we heard some decidedly unCatholic recorded music start to play and three mischievous looking youths assembled at the steps leading up to the main altar. For a moment I thought, gay activists, disruption. (Please excuse my homophobia!) Then a figure in a black cassock and soutane stepped out onto the altar and I realised .... a choreographed life of St John Bosco. I have to say the message I got was of a priest who reached out to troubled youth, a kind,caring and committed individual. It was really pleasant to watch cos these guys could dance.A really excellent presentation.

At the end of the mass there were some presentations, notably pictures of the Annunciation to the church's oldest parishioners, one being a 95 year old woman. It really felt like founder's day and Bisho Panya shook Luna's hand as he left the church. It is also amusing as I am known to an increasing number of students as I do some teaching in the school attached to the church. So a few of them greeted me as "Teacher Gerry" which is a new one for me. The Bishop really is a man of his people. I get the distinct impression he is not a great one for ceremony as he was very happy to walk off the altar to make life easier for some of the older people as they approached and a couple of kids prostrated themselves on the altar and I think in a very kind and gentle way he told them not to bother!

We paraded St John Bosco around the church and school grounds and then sat down to a free lunch with gifts of oranges from the Bishop, about 500 of us! An absolutely fantastic event. Such an easy relaxed atmosphere, everyone happy, and this is mainline Catholicism, handed down by Italian missionary priests, in small town, Buddhist Thailand.

I got a little emotional during the service. I often do at big events. I am reminded of how lucky I am to be alive and moreover how much I enjoy living in Ratchaburi and being a part of this community. One of the resounding themes of my journey is a distinct sense of feeling "other than" and of definitely not belonging. Here I am in Ratchaburi, with Luna, my filipina wife, another alien, who is expecting our first child, and I really don't see beyond this place. I want to stay here, raise my family, work, play golf, enjoy the remainder of my life in a way that was unknown to me until quite recently. So God bless you, St John Bosco, I pray I can be a good husband, father and teacher and reflect your qualities when I deal with "the yoof" of today. Yup this is Thailand, this is Gerry!

Friday, January 23, 2009

Golf in Thailand

Since arriving here at the beginning of October last year I have played on some wonderful golf courses. I regret to say that my golf has been very poor but nevertheless I have to say the courses are really magnificent. My Lonely Planet guide doesn't list Ratchaburi at all......thank God! It has a number of mainstream tourist attractions but in Royal Ratchaburi and Dragon Hills it has two outstanding and extraordinarily good value courses; midweek you'll get a little change out of a 1,000 baht note. Head two hours down the road to Hua Hin, "Golfer's Paradise" (hoho!), you'll be lucky to walk on and play as a visitor for much less than 2,500; the only way you'll play for less is if you are a member's guest; in fact in Golfer's Paradise you can pay 3,500 for your round and ...... So stay away from Ratchaburi and that way I will have these wonderful golf courses all to myself! I was also very impressed when I played Blue Sapphire to the north of Kanchanaburi; a great quality course, difficult, beautiful landscape, and once more midweek expect to play for under 1000 baht all inclusive. I have also played in Korat and Mission Hills, Kanchanaburi, and enjoyed both courses but not quite as memorable as the others I have mentioned.

In general the Thais do golf extremely well. Of course there are some issues which may surprise you. Many courses allow 5/6 balls, especially during the week. I haven't seen faraings playing in such large groups but the locals do. I am reliably informed this is allowed in order to enhance the match as a betting contest. The main problem with this arrangement is that long delays can occur and sometimes our hosts are not amenable to letting smaller groups play through. Then there is the Korean question. Most courses have resorts attached to them and our friends from Korea have a tendency to take over the courses when they move in en masse for their two week junket. In general these guys ( many gals too) are golf nuts, they play 36 holes a day with a lunch break and practise as well. They appear to be indifferent to the needs of other golfers, however, reluctant to give up on a lost ball or let you play through,and some of them are simply rude, hostile and aggressive with little concept of golfing etiquette. But I do not think there can be a nation more wholly committed to the game of golf than Korea and like me, they love their golf in Thailand! Finally it can get very hot!

On the plus side you will generally play on well maintained, beautifully landscaped golf courses and you will find plenty of cold drinks available as you make your way around the course. Locker room/club house facilities vary but you'll get a locker and be able to take a shower and eat etc. One thing I like is you get a caddy for which the course charges 200-250 baht and the convention is you give your caddy a tip of 200 baht or more if you feel generous. Some of them are very helpful, some simply pull your clubs round the course on their trolly and mark your ball for you on the greens, some are completely useless and are more interested in their mobile phones.... Generally I have a high opinion of the caddies.

So what you waiting for. Come to Ratchaburi and enjoy the golf!

Saturday, January 17, 2009

Bangkok a World Class City

I have to say that putting aside things like police corruption, Bangkok really impresses me these days. The sky train ("BTS") and new interlinking underground lines have made it simple and stress free to get around the main central area. It would be good if the operating companies could provide a one day ticket that gives unlimited use of both the BTS and underground lines.

The traffic situation is still congested and always will be but I sense from personal experience that it does flow more easily. I think the pollution situation has also improved but on a hot,humid day it is always going to feel stuffy in a city like Bangkok. But the BTS and underground are a joy to use even when it is very busy. The high speed link to/from the airport is due to open this year and this should result in very rapid transfers. The only real blight will be accessing the Southern Bus Terminal which is way out west on the road to Nakhorn Pathom and home sweet home in Ratchaburi. The cognoscenti, of course, know that the various ferries that ply their trade up and donw the Chao Phaya river are the best way to travel and while you are restricted to a north south axis, the ferries can get you as far north as Ayuthya.

Bangkok also does 5 star extremely well. I can think of no more elegant and relaxing a place to pass a few days than the Marriott Resort on the east side of the Chao Phaya river. You'll pay a lot of money for the privilege but it is a gentle way to ease into this frenetic nerve centre.The free hotel ferry conveniently connects with the BTS. There are numerous top quality hotels in Bangkok and indeed accommodation for every budget but the Marriott stands out as being slightly off centre and spacious. Khao San Road road remains the epitome of backpacker central and is still a popular haunt for seasoned travel veterans, modern day gap year types and fit retirees on RTW junkets in search of cheap lodging.

Of course Bangkok is really an experience, it is not so much about doing things, it is just about being there and being caught up in this pulsating,throbbing and intoxicating city that seems to kick 24 hours every day. Hit the streets and suck in the smell of delicious street food followed by the stench of putrid drains! It is a city of such stark contrasts.....head for the Siam Paragon mall where Lamborghinis and Porsches are on display with every other known branded luxury item, plus a huge aquarium in the basement and in the service areas in the same mall you might well see a bunk bed in a store room which is home for a few cleaners. Bangkok's malls are true temples of retail and moreover offer respite when it is hot out on the street.

The early morning is very rewarding in Bangkok and in Thailand in general. You may encounter a bustling market bulging with stalls laden with fruit, greens,herbs and flowers and saffron robed monks on pindabaat, collecting alms barefooted from the faithful and in return offering a prayer and a blessing. The weekend Chatuchak market in the northern suburbs should be an absolute must for every visitor. It is billed as the largest street market in the world. I am sure its popularity in some ways contributes to its undoing but it is a great experience and there are some great buys for the shrewd.

I love the river, ideal for temple bashing, and just for getting a bit of breeze on your face when it is hot. Increasingly I am growing to like Bangkok's parks.....Lumphini right in the middle, Putthamomton way out west and Rama IX near Chatuchak market. I spent an hour in Lumphini at dusk yeterday looking at birds, nothing significant to report. In fact the people were the real draw, joggers, walkers, family groups out for a gentle stroll; the basketball courts were pretty lively too. SIx o'clock rang out and the park came to a complete standstill as everyone stood for the national anthem which blasted out through a PA System. Yup even the cool dudes playing basketball stopped their slamming as a mark of respect for HRH the King.

Without doubt the real charm of Bangkok is its people, the street vendors, the katoeys, the office girls in their demure twin piece suits, the motorcycle taxi riders, combined with their sheer verve and vitality. Never a dull moment.

I think and indeed I hope the future is very bright indeed for Bangkok.

Friday, January 16, 2009

A Brush with the Law

We drove into Bangkok this morning to register our wedding at the Philippine Embassy. I was driving along Petchaburi patting myself on the back for getting us smoothly downtown when I was stopped by a motorcycle officer of the law. He started telling me I had driven in the wrong lane and produced a diagram in an attempt to explain. I am afraid this is one of these situations when I speak no Thai and same for my wife, she is a filipina. Experienced Thailand hands will know that there are no rules of the road here .... it really is chaos most of the time; cars,trucks, buses,lorries, motorbikes regularily drive against the traffic flow. So I am mildly amused at PC Plod. As I say there is nothing exceptional in this land in seeing a car coming at you in the wrong direction. I was not aware that I had done anything wrong. In the absence of a driving licence I produced my passport, everything in order there, plod tells me I will need to report to the police station to pay a fine of 500b. I said ok, no problem, and he approaches me and says he will accept 300b if I pay him now. It is another no brainer but it still pisses me off as it is basically a shake down. Anyhow I paid and made the most of my day in Bangkok. The moral of the story folks is keep your window up when you drive in Bangers so the filth don't know there is an ATM driving the car! In fairness a similar scenario back home would have worked out costing a lot more and also it is done and dusted. I also have no doubt that if I had stood my ground I would probably be in a police cell and the car would have been impounded and I might be on my way out of Thailand.... Leaves a bad taste but hey I'll get over it, I'll be ok.....bastards!

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Sweet home Ratchaburi

I am really so happy living in Ratchaburi and indeed in Thailand. I enjoy my trips up to Isaan,Bangkok, Petchaburi, Cha am or Hua Hin. I am even going to pay a visit to Pattaya next month to attend the annual AA round up there. I have never been there before drunk or sober. From what I hear it is party central and completely full on, in your face! But I can't get enough of this country and want to see as much of it as I can.I have to see Pattaya and there is probably no safer a way than to go to an AA round up and bring my wife with me!

The quality of life I enjoy here is fantastic so much so that we plan to stay here after our new baby, due July 5th, comes into this world....God willing Yup, Luna now looks pregnant. These are truly exciting times for us both. Now do I want to be working 6 very long days a week to make money in London, and live in cramped quarters and have to worry about every penny? Or would I rather stay here and maybe teach 30 hours a week and be able to spend quality time with my wife and family? It's a no brainer really.

I don't need expensive cars, (ok it would be nice to drive an E or S class!) or villas with swimming pools in gated communities or membership at the top golf courses. These are available here at a competitive price. However I have a nice little Honda Jazz, stay in a cheap rented house without hot water(!) and object to paying more than 1500b for a round of golf and prefer to pay under 1000b! Most days I eat on the street, pineapple, jack fruit, pomelo, water melon topped up with noodle soup, fried rice with some combination of meat or sea food. I live modestly but stress I am very comfortable. We have cable TV and broadband. What more could I want?! What use would an armed guard be to me?!

These last few days I have been doing a little teaching in one of the local schools. Strictly pro bono but in return I get some experience on the chalk face and there is talk of possibly being contracted to a full time post at the start of the next school year in May. That would be wonderful as it would enable us to stay here even longer if not indefinitely. So right now I am in a good position. The kids are great, really keen learners and I hope I can do them justice.

In the last few weeks I have been looking at a lot of Thai birds. Yup! Birds! Check out Thai Birding. I cannot even start to tell you the fun we have had. Luna is the Queen of the Kingfishers! There are some amazing birds to be seen and I think we are on to something. Great fun! More will follow!

It is also unseasonably cold here. The locals are really feeling it.... especially in the morning when there has been a really cold wind blowing these last few days. Apparently sub-zero temperatures have been recorded overnight in northern provinces. I have to confess I am aware that it is colder but I am mildly amused by it. The weather is still great and when I read that it is -10 in London I know where I would prefer to be!

The political situation appears to have stabilised in Thailand. Khun Abhisit, the new Prime Minister, appears to have embarked on a charm offensive ..... sending out SMS and distributing calendars. Moreover he appears to be paying a lot of attention to Isaan, traditionally Mr Thaksin's power base. The most important thing is that life is calm here and there is no immediate prospect of trouble right now. Obviously this could change suddenly. But Thailand appears to be settling down again though I do believe the recent problems have been disastrous for the economy. I think Khun Abhisit may prove to be a very shrewd choice: he is young, good looking, bright, media savvy and untainted. The right man I think. I very much hope he continues to establish himself and enjoys a long period in office.

Tomorrow Mission Hills Golf Course, near Kanchanaburi, designed by one Jack Nicklaus, and surely amazing value at 960b for a round. You take care!

Saturday, January 10, 2009

Isaan Wedding

Isaan is the North East of Thailand, a huge plateau, Thailand's rice bowl so to speak. It is sun baked, parched, dry and dirty, the soil giving off red dirt which features largely in the local Isaan dialect. Yet it is a mere 2.5 hours drive form the northern suburbs of Bangkok, although it extends for several hundred kilometres to the border. It is a poor place, subsistence farming predominating, and life is a grind. This is the real Thai heartland.

The region provides Thailand with much of its unskilled labour and a significant number of the girls end up in the sex industry in the cities. The people are traditionally dark skinned, not quite in vogue in Bangkok's style cathedrals where white/fair is absolutely de rigueur. Most people leave the land and head off to Bangkok and the cities in search of economic advancement and a lot of the money is sent home to Isaan to support the family network. If you meet Isaan people away from home in Thailand they will tell you how much they miss their families, the village, the food,the life, the culture and long to return home.

It's been a good few years since I visited Isaan so I was delighted to be invited to Davies & Bom's wedding in a small village south of Saeng Song, about 90 minutes west of Korat (Nakhon Ratchasima), the main economic centre of Isaan and a big bustling city.

What a celebration! Wednesday night a major party with musicians and dancers and the village effectively closed down. The whole village was in attendance and the beers and rice wine (lao) were flowing and a fair few of the locals were "hammered". As a general rule Thai drunks are harmless and actually quite funny. As always at Thai parties there was an amazing amount of food as pigging out is a major part of the fun. It was delicious, green curry,prawns, fish, kebabs, satay, sticky rice, delicious fruit salad and the best fresh orange juice I have tasted in a long time. There was a lot of dancing on stage and below. In fact there was so much noise coming from the sound system it would have been virtually impossible to sleep anywhere in the immediate vicinity of the village. A strange mixture of locals and well heeled Americans (mainly) but there were a few Europeans amongst the faraing.

One funny anecdote. I travelled with a friend, Lauren, who came along to my wedding last year. As we were leaving I gave the singers some money. This is all part of the way it works. There had been a steady flow of people handing money up to the entertainers on the stage; it is a sign of kindness and jai dee, good heart. You get a big cheer from the onlookers and a wai from the entertainers and I think the locals like to see the faraings get the readies out. Let me stress the village people (sic!) were also making donations. Lauren went to give some money to the dancers who were off stage, just to the left, and when he came back he told me one of the girls said we could have her and her friend for 500 baht for the night! This was a source of considerable amusement among the faraing. This is just the way it is. Sad in some respects but yes this is how it is sometimes.

Later Davies, our host, gave the girl Lauren's phone number. It turns out her name is Soda and she phoned Lauren at 0330h, waking me up in the process, to entice him. I don't think they were able to understand each other! I never got to meet or see the friend. I am a happily married man!

Thursday morning was wedding day proper. Eight monks came for alms at about 0730h and then sat down upstairs with bride and groom and joined them together with string which they were all holding and began chanting and blessing the union. This lasted about an hour and then the village head man and elders came in for breakfast.

Davies and his cohorts were required to leave the house after, take a walk, so to speak. We were joined by a band and a procession of villagers and we went on a walk around the village, making a lot of noise and doing a lot of strange dancing. We stopped outside the houses and made a lot of noise as if to say: this guy is getting married come out and join us as we head to his bride's house. We reached the house where there was a brief dialogue, ( have you got the dowery, you sure you want to go through with this etc?). Davies' feet were washed for him and we were invited upstairs where Davies joined his wife and the village head man kicked off the ceremony. The couple were blessed and a white paste applied to their foreheads; once more they were joined by string; as the blessings flowed there was a lot of shrieking and rice throwing; the dowery, paid by Davies to the bride's family, was laid out along with gifts of gold and then strings were tied and by about 1100h the wedding was over. No sooner was it over than everyone was changed out of their gear and back in shorts and t-shirts!

There was much mirth about Lauren and Soda and with Davies' help an 1800 tryst was set up for them later that day. I drove home early afternoon and it was genuinely nice to be home and be with Luna. I am so grateful I am a happily married man these days. I wasn't when I last visited Isaan and I am glad I am far removed from that whole scene.

Saturday, January 3, 2009

Good to be Back in Thailand!

Can you hear Gary Glitter singing "Hello,Hello,Good to be back....."?! Mmmmmm well maybe I should not mention Mr Gadd but his 70s hits were always characterised by catchy riffs, lyrical and/or musical, and if I am not mistaken you can still catch them at US baseball games and the like. Leaving convicted paedophiles to one side it is only on returning that I come to understand how much I missed some of the very simple things that make life in Thailand so appealing. Good to be back indeed....

Really it is the people, first and foremost. The steward on the train, trying to sell everybody beer. She did the same the whole way down to Malaysia. "Ao gin bia mai?" Do you weat to eat beer? Literally! I reply I don't and would like tea and she says ok, and comes back 5 minutes later and asks me all smiles "Ao gin bia mai?" and it is fair to say she asks everyone this same question. Thai people, (careful, generalisations and stereotypes coming!!!), seem to generate this energy....the first level crossing we pass the motorbikes, crammed with people, wait, everyone seems to be talking to each other, people checking their looks in hand held mirrors, if not their wing mirrors, ( men as bad as the women!), lots of smiling happy people and then we pass a small, bustling street market, everything is lit up as it is dark, and everyone is rammed in, with lines of motorbikes and pick up trucks parked near by and it is just a hive of activity and colour from the fruit and vegetable. This appears to be near universal in Thailand.

The food....God what a difference. I ate some delicious green curry as we headed north, standard rail fare, but it could not have been more different to most of the food in Malaysia.

We got into Hua Hin at about 0715 and it was deserted. A taxi tout wanted to charge me 150 baht to take me to the car and was most put out when I started laughing at his price. Probably at least 3 times the normal amount. Now I am not going to haggle with someone like this even if he voluntarily brings his price down. I will not even engage him in any further discussion. It is over buddy between you and I. I don't trade with crooks! You lost the job buddy we'll walk! So we walked, my taxi tout losing any prospect of any income from us which I hope will learn him to be more respectful! I would suggest you do this if you are not happy about a price especially if you think it is obscene, just walk away, you are under no obligation to haggle, and if it is with tuktuks and the like, and you really need one, you'll get a straight one soon enough at a reasonable price. The competition is watching!

Looked as if the locals had been giving it large in Hua Hin for the New Year.Completely dead

Caught news of a major fire in Bangkok killing 59 people. No real details but no doubt a major tragedy......how dreadful going out to revel and celebrate the New Year and getting torched or suffocated.

We decided to head to Cha am for breakfast, about 25 kms north. A mistake. At 0745 Cha am was full on, you could hardly move on the street as the Thais were out getting on with their New Year celebrations! The thing is the Western New Year is increasingly a big holiday in Thailand and with the second day of the New Year being a Friday then a lot of people have turned it into a long weekend. Cha am was thick with people. Thai style, start early!

A further sad note is the carnage on the roads. I think there were 143 killed on New Years Eve and 85 killed on New Years Day. Drink and overladen motorbikes feature prominently in these casualties.....same story at most festivities, especially the Thai New Year in April.

So we made it home and once more what joy to eat lovely food with delicious sauces and dips and we had some pineapple that was ripe and juicy and quite different from everything we had in Malaysia. I had some beautiful red pork bamee nam last night. The best, at 25 baht! You see the girl that runs the noodle stand understands I am a good customer so she charges me what she charges the locals as she wants my business....I eat there three/four times a week. It really is a no brainer. I learned this in the taxi game. Charge everyone the right price, if there is any problem settle at a lower rate, for instance if I could not give the customer change settle in their favour to get them out the car and the next customer in. People threw money at me. "Oh don't worry, keep the change and look here's a fiver have a good Christmas!"

Good to be back indeed! I have another 90 days stamped into my passport.

Trust you all had a good New Year.